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13 Great Tweets That’ll Make You Forget About The Horrible World

(Source: collegehumor.com)

1. On a scale of No Diggity – An Overwhelming Surplus of Diggity, how was your date last night?

This is the scale that I will be using for everything from now on. pic.twitter.com/WPBxy0eDQl

— [title] ♥.(.Zannah.). [surname] (@zannah) May 3, 2018

2. Gotta show those friends some support.

me hyping up my friend’s picture on instagram even tho they showed it to me for approval an hour before that pic.twitter.com/01vM3ijsTS

— monty (@cumrascal) May 2, 2018

3. It’s a start.

the mood pic.twitter.com/03HlSjOXQ5

— It’s me, Koko! (@kokoronis) May 3, 2018

4. Me as well.

Me subtweeting pic.twitter.com/1SjyMxRpeW

— Mrs. Fiona Charming (@bewkhewker) May 3, 2018

5. Good question.

what religion is this pic.twitter.com/pUtOXbK3XM

— gary from teen mom (@garyfromteenmom) May 3, 2018

6. You gotta time these things perfectly, or else.

DO NOT REMOVE CARD
DO NOT REMOVE CARD
DO NOT REMOVE CARD
REMOVE CARD
REMOVE CARD
YOU WAITED TOO LONG
YOUR FAMILY IS DEAD
AN ANCIENT EVIL HAS AWAKENED

— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 6, 2018

7. Who knew I’d love looking at bee ass.

If you liked “the bee’s knees,” then you’ll love
B U M B L E B O T T O M S pic.twitter.com/dQ1Vqx5rh4

— 🌸☠️ Nora ☠️🌸 (@NoraVonNotABird) May 3, 2018

8. Season 2 is gonna be fucking great.

okay, I’m excited about Westworld again pic.twitter.com/b4AqQ54hZD

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) May 3, 2018

9. Weird ethnicities but who am I to judge?

Just got my 23 and Me test results back, and I’m:
41% skater boy
58% see you
69% later boy
78% not good enough for her

— chareth cutestory (@garlicboner) May 4, 2018

10. Hope those things are insured.

When someone asks about my retirement plan pic.twitter.com/C47auCHkhr

— Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) May 3, 2018

11. And healthier.

Don’t freak out but regular worms are gummy too

— ᴍᴀᴛᴛ ᴊᴀᴍᴇs (@_Matt_James_) January 11, 2018

12. She asked nicely, so at least consider it.

whoever has my voodoo doll please finger it

— madison (@meatymadison) April 28, 2018

13. If I get called daddy snack bae ONE more time.

1998:

“That boy is cute but I don’t know what to say to him”

2018:

“Fist my asshole into oblivion daddy snack bae”

— Brandon Calvillo (@BJCalvillo) April 29, 2018

More Info: collegehumor.com

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